The One Thing Being Asked of You Right Now

When was the last time you heard your own voice, not the group chat’s, not the feed’s, just yours?

Authenticity is one of those words we all bandy about. It’s on posters and in captions under perfect photos. So it’s easy to stop hearing it.

But in this strange time, when so much feels like it’s coming apart, I believe authenticity is the one thing being asked of us. Not the poster version. Your own. It’s what can hold you steady while the ground keeps moving.

A compass, pulled off true

Think of an ordinary hiking compass. The needle is built to find north. Left alone, it goes there every time.

Now set it down next to your phone, a speaker, or the hood of a car. The needle swings. It points somewhere else than where it should. Nothing is broken. It’s just reading whatever it’s next to.

That’s what living inside other people’s expectations feels like. Family, friends, the group chat, the feed, what “everyone” seems to think. When you spend all your time with others, your social media feed, your own compass feels likes it’s reading them instead of you. And you start to just accept everything but you.

It’s like your own voice goes quiet and becomes unrecognizable to you.

And you didn’t do that to yourself. Most of that pull was set up around you long before you got a say in it.

Your north never moved. The interference just got closer. And it became harder to hear your own voice.

The questions that check the needle

Authenticity is that small calling deep in your heart. That little voice inside yourself that you might be able to hear when you stop and listen. It asks quiet questions.

Am I living a life that feels well lived? Are these choices mine, or am I living a life that serves everyone but me? Do I follow my own compass, my own north star? Or do I go along with the group because it’s easier? And if I take a wrong turn, can I change course toward what feels like me?

Then comes the big one. What on earth do I actually think? What do I actually feel about anything?

If you can’t answer that right away, that’s okay. Most of us were never given the space to ask.

Knowing yourself vs. defending yourself

The more you know yourself, the more agility you bring to life. Decisions come quicker, because you’re not polling everyone first. You stop needing to defend your way, or judge anyone else’s. And you realize you’re a work in progress, free to try things on and change.

When someone disagrees with you, you don’t feel knocked off center. You notice the difference without needing to dismiss them or get angry. Often the conflict around you starts to defuse, because you’re not adding fuel to it.

That’s what a settled needle looks like. It isn’t rigid. It just keeps coming back to what is true for you.

You being you is a strength, not a stance against anyone.

And it ripples. When you’re clear about yourself, you grow more tolerant of other people’s beliefs and ways of living. By being you, you quietly show others they’re allowed to be themselves too. Not what society says they should be. What they truly are.

And from that point, you create the life that is true to you, rather than someone else’s dreams and beliefs.

So what would fill your soul?

You see, it’s so easy to believe what others believe. It’s easy to live the life others picture for you. But conformity to things we don’t actually care about is the trap.

Does the life you’re living fill your soul with joy? And if not, what would?

You can’t run off to a cave. You have work on Monday. And for most you don’t need a cave. You just need a few minutes away from the interference.

How often do you sit in stillness, with no screen, no interruptions, no group think, and just listen to your heart? Then go back to your friends and your full life, and keep taking those minutes for you.

A five-step return to true north

Try this over the next seven days. Keep a notebook nearby.

1. Take stock of you, today. Write down the beliefs you carry about yourself, your work, your family and how you live. What makes your heart sing? Not sure what feels true? Let your body be the compass. Notice whether each thing makes you feel smaller and tighter, or more open and expansive. Contraction can be a sign it isn’t truly yours. Truth feels expansive, and it has a pull. What pulls you?

1. Choose one small thing that has always interested you. A potter’s wheel. A hockey team. A short story. Go do it, then notice how it felt.

1. Reflect. Sit still, take a walk, or talk it over with a trusted friend who will simply hold space, no advice. This sorts what you actually think from what the group thinks.

1. Write the reflections down. Your soul is trying to guide you, but it needs room to be heard. When you’re always on a screen or always with people, the breadcrumbs are hard to see.

1. Follow the pull. Act on one thing that showed up. Each small step shows you more of what drives you, what sets your heart on fire and what turns you off.

At the end of the week, read back through your notebook. Notice where the needle kept settling.

Your own rock

It can feel a little scary at first. That’s normal. In my experience, the more you come home to yourself, the steadier you feel. A quiet confidence grows, and you begin to realize you can be your own rock.

This isn’t a one-week fix. Becoming yourself is a compounding journey: reflect, adjust, repeat. It means taking off the cloaks of everything that isn’t you, and building a life on your own uniqueness. This is what true manifestation is. Its when you work on your life and your life begins to reflect what is you.

This journey takes courage and authenticity. And I believe you have got what it takes.

So I’ll leave you with this. If you put down everything that isn’t yours for a moment, can you feel into where your needle points?